Me and My Three Selves

Winter has arrived, and here the proof! This picture is taked outside my window last week. It truly is a beautiful site!

The December Issue of Tone is out and your's truly has an article in it. For those who don't receive the Tone Magazine, I've posting the article here. Read on.....

Me and My Three Selves

Different teachings and philosophies speak of the various aspects of the self: higher self, lower self, the inner witness or observer, mind, emotion, spirit, unconscious, preconscious, conscious, god self, little self, ego, id, super-ego… the list goes on. As you can see, regardless of which school of thought one follows, there are many dimensions to who we experience as our self.

To consciously create your life, you need to become aware of the various aspects of yourself. All dimensions of you make up the “you” who is the main attractor factor of your creations. While the law of attraction explains that we attract what we focus our attention on, our main attractor factor is actually the “who” we are, who is focusing attention.

Here is what I’ve been noticing about the various dimensions of myself lately.

I’ve become increasingly aware of my observer self who is often intrigued and fascinated with what goes on in my mind. It really helps me detached from the inner dialogue (sometimes drama) that is happening and it notices how the thoughts are affecting me. My observer self notices the difference between my other two selves and likes to direct me to my greater self (a.k.a. higher self, god self, Christ self).

This dimension of me is quite wise (no idea where she gets her stuff), often has enlightening perspectives to share with me and offers me the best advice. This self keeps me in the flow and feeling good! This is the aspect of me, I want creating my reality!

My third self – well, to be frank, leaves much to be desired and often grates on my nerves. It offers the worst advice, pulls me down emotionally, and says the nastiest things about me and others. In the past, it has tried to lift me up by inflating my self perception in ways that have led to humiliating experiences. It tells me how I can’t, won’t and shouldn’t even think of doing anything daring or risky that would be beneficial for my development. This self goes by various names like saboteur, ego, gremlin – I’ve been partial to the term gremlin lately. As I’m writing this, this aspect of me is telling me that I probably sound nuts right now while my greater self is telling me “they know what you’re talking about, keep writing” and I feel it is my observer self who is giving me these words to write.

My three selves: observer self, greater self and gremlin self – then there is me. Me is the one who is experiencing all of my selves (a.k.a. myself and I). I am the one who is at some level giving attention to the part of myself who is expression through me and as me. It is the part choosing, consciously or unconsciously, the “who” that I am, who is attracting to me. So there is me, and my three selves, all of whom are the creators of my daily life.

However you perceive or experience your whole self, as you become increasingly aware of the various aspects of yourself, you can consciously choose who you are at any moment. Having said that, having to consciously choose who to be in every moment is a tall order indeed and is an unrealistic expectation of yourself. Therefore, I offer you this prayer, to help direct all of who you are, who to be, as you consciously create each day.

Through Me (note to selves)

Through me see beauty
Through me see potential
Through me feel healthy
Through me feel joy
Through me experience prosperity
Through me experience freedom
Through me express kindness
Through me express authentically
Through me hear possibilities
Through me hear truth
Through me demonstrate faith
Through me demonstrate respect
Through me serve
Through me inspire
Through me live life
Through me love

Copyright © 2007 by Kim Barnwell – All rights reserved

Published in Tone Magazine December 2007 issue.

Are You Attracting or Repelling Your Thriving Practice?

I'm going to be the guest host on Thriving Coaches round table on Monday November 26, at 8pm ET (follow the link to register and receive the bridgeline number). I hope you'll join us!
Here is a little article I wrote to introduce the topic for the call:

Are You Attracting or Repelling Your Thriving Practice?

Are you getting in the way of your thriving practice? Has this ever happened to you: you wanted a new client or speaking opportunity, you receive the lead and then next thing you know the deal falls through or the new client cancels or postpones their appointment?

We create our experiences, mostly unconsciously, that is what the law of attraction explains. As our attention is focused on what we want, we attract and when we focus on what we don’t want, we repel - what we want! We are in the constant flux of attracting and repelling through our thoughts, attitudes, beliefs, focus and feelings. The key is in knowing how it is you’re naturally doing both.

Once you’ve communicated with your new lead are you noticing how you’re probably not the best coach for them or how compatible you are? Are you thinking “they won’t be able to afford my fee” or do you assume they can otherwise they won’t have contacted you. Do you try to figure out how to fix their issue or do you automatically think of how inspiring their vision is? The more you start noticing what you think of or focus on automatically, you’ll start connecting the dots to how you are attracting or repelling your thriving practice.
The good news is that thoughts are never carved in stone. When you catch yourself in “repel” mode, you can make a conscious choice to think a more attracting thought, thereby redirecting the outcome. You may not be able to change history, however if you’ve repelled an opportunity or client, by changing your thoughts or redirecting your focus, you will attract new ones – attracting your thriving practice.

Conscious Change and Flow

When initiating conscious change, there is a balance to be struck between “going with the flow” and “directing the flow”. The universe is constantly receiving and responding to “you”, and what makes up the vibration of “you” includes how you express yourself verbally, mentally, and emotionally as well as your values and beliefs. Once you’ve decide to initiate a change, the flow will be your queue as to how aligned this change is to all of who you are.

When you instigate change that is congruent to the “You” of who you are, you’ll know. It will appear as though the whole universe is conspiring to help you. Everything just falls into place. As you remain open to receiving guidance from your inner wise self, you can direct the flow of your life, feeling yourself along the way.

When you try to force a change that you’re not truly aligned with, it feels like the universe is against you. Any effort feels really hard; synchronicities become rare and you feel like you’ve been striped of your manifesting abilities. This is what going against your own flow feels like, when something about the change you’ve initiated is compromising the core vibration of who you are. It doesn’t mean you have to abort the plan; however it is time to review it. Perhaps there’s a conflict with one of your values or beliefs, or it could also be that the timing isn’t right. You may simply need to slow down and wait for inspired direction.

Another time to lift your oars out of the water and let yourself go with the flow is when you notice yourself following the directive of your negative ego or saboteur. This will also feel like you’re forcing against the current. In those moments as you release your oars, invite your greater self to take over and the universe to show you what your next step in redirecting you to your flow is. Then breathe deeply, listen and notice. Remain open to receiving guidance, unattached to what it looks like or how it comes. When it comes, you’ll know – it’ll just feel right.

Enjoy the Magic!

Change and Trees

Have you ever noticed how peacefully a tree allows its leaves to fall from it every autumn?
You don't see the branches of the tree reaching out trying to force their leaves to stay. No, the tree gracefully allows the leaves to fall, courageously baring itself to the harsh winter elements. Then in the spring, the trees faith in nature is met with the blossoming of new buds - the natural order of life.

We are always changing - change is a constant in life. With every breath we inhale and exhale we are changing the oxygen in our body. Each time we move our eyes we change what we see and every time we change our mind, we change our focus. How often does that happen in a day? There are numerous other ways we change every day without even thinking about it.

Yet we resist change - not all change perhaps, however have you ever found yourself kicking and screaming in response to the news of yet another change that is about to occur? I know I have.

Just the other day, I walked over to the grocery store to buy my favorite cereal for breakfast and THEY WERE OUT!!! Every other Nature's Path Organic cereal was available in abundance except for my favorite one (Optimum Power Blueberry Flax Soy)!

As I stood there dazed and confused by the coincidence that they were only out of MY cereal, I became aware (and embarrassed) at how I was letting this affect me. Here I was, having gone through sooooo many more challenging changes in my life of 42 years and I was being thrown off balance because I was going to have to choose a different cereal. Get a grip Kim!

Can you relate to my story?

How is it that change is the most natural thing we do as humans, yet conscious change can be so difficult? Either the status quo has to become too painful, annoying or boring to endure any longer or the grocery store runs out of your favorite cereal so you "have to" try a new one.

Change is life experienced. Unconscious change results in life experiences that we may or may not like - recurring patterns. Conscious change results in creating the life experience we want! Forced change such as the fires recently experienced in Southern California shakes up the status quo and always leads to new - like it or not. Once we start recovering from the shock and trauma of such an event, we need to think about moving forward. The people who have lost their homes will spend time reflecting on their lives, gaining clarity on what is truly important to them. Some people will aim to recreate what they've lost. Others will let go of their past, either intending a new start or allowing themselves to be guided day by day. While for others, this will have been the disguised blessing they'll always remember as being the catalyst that lead to a whole new life adventure. Everyone will move forward in the best way that they can.

As for the vast forested area that was affected by the fire, it'll use this mass cleansing to its advantage, re-balancing that which needed re-balancing for its eco-system, in the way nature that knows best.