Friday

Dream Dump

 


This year as  we get ready to enter 2012, feels like a good time to do some heavy duty  clearing. Time for a “Dream Dump”!  I  know, I know, I’m the coach. I’m the one who’s suppose to help you connect to  your dreams, bring them to life, and here I am suggesting you “dump” them.

The world as we’ve known it is continuing to change right  before our eyes. We are living in a time when being empowered, living  consciously and conscientiously, making choices that are aligned with the  wellbeing of our planet and all of its inhabitants, has (thankfully) become  more important than pursuing the frivolous life. Yet many of us still have the  energy of the ‘dreams’ of our past, based on a less congruent way of living,  pulling at us, having us sometimes feel at odds with… well, with ourselves. Do  you ever feel yourself ‘knowing’ what the right thing to do is yet you  experience yourself doing something different?  This is an indication that you may be operating under the influence of  an old, outdated ‘dream’.

The sort of dreams that I’m referring to  include the ones we’ve imagined about how life “should” be, as well as the  stories we’ve made up about the life we’ve had. They include the perceived  nightmares and demons of our past that keep us from seeing beyond our struggles  and failures. They include the fantasies we’ve made up about how people in our  lives should be (versus accepting who they are), the unmet expectations we’ve
had of them and of the events that have sometimes lead to disappointments and  feelings of betrayal. This sort of energy keeps us anchored to a disempowered  version of ourselves, others and potential.

In order to make ALL of who you are available for the new,  you need to get rid of ALL who you were - including your old DREAMS. As
mythologist Joseph Campbell puts it,  “We must let go of  the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”  

Dream Dump Exercise:

Grab a piece of paper and write your name at the top, followed  by Dream Dump. Mine looks like this:

Kim’s Dream Dump

 

Take all of  the dreams and nightmares you’ve made up, as well as the ones you’ve inherited  from your family and society, and dump them on the page in writing.

To help you prepare for the dream dump, I’ve included a  Wheel of Life. As you consider each spoke in the wheel, ask yourself these two
questions:

  1. Is  there a dream (my own or one I’ve inherited) that has not come to fruition
    in this area?
  2. What  are the dreams and nightmares I’ve made up in this area?

For example: Career: Dream of  working with partners.  I’ve made up that  I need to work with others, that I can’t be successful on my own. I’ve made up  that I don’t work well with others, that I have to do it all by myself.

You may find that some of the  dreams you hold contradict each other (like mine above). This is completely  normal and a good reason to dump them ALL.  One of the side effects to doing this exercise is that you may uncover  the source of many of your internal conflicts. Becoming conscious of them will  empower you to choose more congruently in the New Year.

Remember to include all that  you’ve made up about others and yourself – stuff like “I’m not good enough”,  “It’s not safe to be myself with others”, “I can’t trust him” or “She’ll never  understand me”. It is amazing the stuff we can make up from a single  experience.

Now, I realize that what I’m  about to suggest next is going to sound counter intuitive however, I want you  to ‘dump’ all the good dreams too. Hear me out; imagine going to your favorite  restaurant and discovering they’ve taken your favorite dessert – say chocolate  mousse – off the menu. Now you’re forced to either try a new dessert, or go  without. You decide to order the amaretto cheesecake and you love it!  As you’re eating your new favorite dessert, inspiration hits!  What if you got the recipes for both desserts  and combined them? You’d have an amaretto chocolate mousse cheesecake. Oh  my!  Can you imagine how scrumptious that  would be?

For some of us this is not going  to be an easy breezy exercise. Personally, I was surprised at how challenging  it was to come up with a dream dump to use here as an example. For others, the  idea of completing this exercise may not resonate at all - trust yourself.  The intention of this exercise is to free  ourselves up from the past, so that more of who we are, and more of what is  possible will avail itself as we move into consciously creating 2012 and  beyond.

When you feel like all of your  dreams have been dumped, destroy them!  If you can safely do so, burn them; if not, shred them.

Once the dreams are dumped and  destroyed, then what?     

Enjoy Your Dream Vacation!

 

Once you’ve dumped and destroyed all of your dreams – breath deep!!  Take the rest of the year to remain empty and allow the festivities of the
holidays to dance in the space you’ve created. Similarly to taking a vacation  from work, you’re taking a vacation from your dreams.  Schedule January 1st 2012 as the  “return to dreaming” date, the day when you can start contemplating about  what’s next, allowing your mind to wonder through all the potential within you  and around you – to make it all up again from scratch… but until then, bask in  the vast expansiveness your dream dump has created and enjoy your  ‘dream  vacation’.

 

© 2011 All Rights Reserved Conscious Creation

Patches 1992-2011


Dear Patches

Thank you for the joy and love you brought to my life. From the day I found you at the Humane Society, full of nippy spunk and energy, our loving connection grew. Your purrs that soothed, snuggles that warmed, licks of affection and growls of protection are going to be missed. So many fond memories and soulful, heartfelt moments.

While my eyes cry, my heart feels the joy and happiness you get to now experience at the Rainbow Bridge. I’ll be awhile, so enjoy yourself and your regained freedom. And feel free to come back in another form of cat or dog and we can pick up where we left off in sharing the Love.

Love you my dear feline friend. I’m more having experienced your Love.
Kim

Guilt's Gift

Guilt and shame get such a bad rap. I do understand how it may not be everyone’s cup of tea, it doesn’t usually make us feel very good; it makes us feel small, shallow… like we want crawl under something and just disappear. Guilt and shame are awful feelings to have… however if they can serve a purpose are they really all that bad?

I use to hate guilt – I’d tell people I have no use for it! However in spite of my attempts to reject it – I kept feeling it. Its perseverance has helped me to recognize the gifts of guilt and shame.

Guilt has served me well over the years. It has helped me to be a better a friend, to myself and others. It’s helped me recognize when I wasn’t living my values or when I was doing something for the wrong reason. It has made me kinder, more patient and understanding. Guilt serves as a moral compass, pointing me towards how to be a better person when I forget… and we all forget every now and then. I’m very grateful to guilt, for being the kick in the butt I’ve needed when I’ve slacked off on my exercise routine, the inspiration I’ve needed to write a new blog post (like this one  ) and the empowerment I’ve needed when I’ve been tempted to give my power away to someone or something outside of myself.

Making friends with guilt is one of the best things I’ve ever done. Now when it creeps in – and oooh I know the feeling so well that I can usually sense when it’s been triggered even the slightest – when it creeps in, I pay attention. I ask myself: “What am I compromising in this moment? Which one of my values am I stepping on? What is my intention? What do I really want to do or say? What is most important to me?” Or if the feeling has come in “after – the – fact” then I’ll ask myself: “What was my intention at the time? Was that the best I could do in the moment, given what I knew then? Would I do it again? What would I do differently next time?”
Most importantly… I ask myself whether or not I need to apologize to someone and if so, I do. As a friend, guilt and shame can make you think before choosing and reflect after the fact to learn and grow from experience.

Guilt helps me take responsibility for myself, to be responsible of me and who I am choosing to be. By working with the feelings of guilt or shame when they come up, instead of trying to deny their existence or push them away, I give myself the opportunity of expressing the better version of myself in that moment.

Yes – guilt feels awful and can make you want to curl up and disappear – however if you let it, it will show you its gift and help you stand tall and shine. Your choice!