Coaching Tip: Reframing Failure
Far too often we can be hard on ourselves for not meeting our goals or intentions. If you did not accomplish something on your list, it is only considered to be a failure if it is a goal you still want to achieve, one that is really important for you the keep working at, but you choose to let it go instead. The journey to completing any goal is exactly that - a journey. It is a journey which often includes travelling along winding roads, up hills (usually steep ones!), down hills, along peaks and valleys, through various weather conditions, climates and terrains and in the end, it takes the time it takes. If you didn't complete something on your list over the past year, ask yourself the following questions:
What was important to me about this goal when I decided to take it on?
What is most important to me now in relation to this goal?
What have I learnt so far? What has changed?
If I continue working towards this goal, what will it require of me? Who will I need to be?
If I decide to let it go now, what impact will that decision have on my life 5 or 10 years from now?
Having answered the above questions, now decide: Do I want to continue working towards this goal in this new year or it is it time to let it go?
While it may be tempting to that ask the last question first, I recommend keeping it to the end. Getting yourself thinking along the lines of values and what is important to you will lead you to make a more congruent decision about how important it is to keep working at it or to let it go.
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