Do You See Who I See?

How are you seeing yourself?  As we grow and evolve, we don’t always notice just how much we’ve grown and evolved and who we’ve become.  We’re too close to ourselves to see ourselves as others see us.

I recall one day when I was working at the bank (in my previous life), I was just starting out in my new management role and I noticed one of the tellers looking at me in what felt like a truly respectful way, like he was seeking my approval. I remember how it struck me as very odd that someone could be seeking ‘my’ approval. He was seeing me, very differently than how I was seeing myself in that moment.   

Yesterday I was chatting with friend/colleague, who was sharing her experience of being approached to coach a high level executive within a large corporation. As I heard her go on about feeling like doing so was out of her league, I thought… am I hearing this right? Is she actually doubting her ability to coach someone based on their position and how much they earn?  Sure enough, that was exactly what was going on. What amazed me was that this is the sort of client I thought she was already working with. As a colleague and friend, I would not have even imagined that she was anything less than fully capable and qualified to coach such a person – heck, in my opinion Donald Trump would benefit from working with her!  

Having her share this experience with me reminded me of how normal it can be to not fully acknowledge our own growth and evolution – and it’s not just me.   

If you’re now wondering – “hey, maybe I’m not seeing myself quite as accurately as whom I am”, here is a challenge for you that I often give my clients.  Send an email to 3-5 people asking them to answer the following questions, candidly and honestly:

In your opinion, what are my best qualities?

What do you assume about me that may or may not be true?

If you could change one thing about me, what would it be?

These questions are just suggestions – use them, edit them or come up with your own. The idea is to give yourself the opportunity to see yourself as others see you – you may be surprised by how you’re seen! 

Re-Write Your History!

Re-Write Your History and Create the Future You Want!

Have you become a victim to your past? Decided you’re unlovable, unworthy or less than because of the meaning you’ve assigned to the experiences you’ve had?  Life happens, events occur – we see things, exchange words, experience feelings and then we use our interpretation of what we’ve experienced to assign meaning to it all. Have you ever noticed that a number of people can participate in the same event yet each person will have their own unique experience of it?  My honey and I can watch the same movie, seeing the same scenes and hearing the same words yet we don’t always re-act the same to it. He’ll laugh when I cry and usually one of us ends up enjoying the movie more than the other.  

This is exactly what we do in our lives – we assign meaning to the events we experience, based on how we’ve interpreted it at the time. The meaning then becomes our memory of the event, having a natural influence on the flow of our lives. Our past, which remains part of us, continues to influence how we participate in creating our lives moving forward. Every time a memory is triggered in a present moment, the emotional tone (energy) of the meaning we’ve previously assigned to it naturally influences how we are creating in that moment - it becomes part of the mix.

“The only meaning that anything has is the meaning we give it.”  A Course in Miracles

If the meaning you’ve given your past is not supporting you in creating the life you want now – change it! Sounds easy, doesn’t it? Not always.  Not when the meaning  we’ve given the story is keeping us safe or powering us up by making us feel important, right or justified. This sort of empowerment is usually gained through a limiting power source – a source that takes from another in a depreciating way.

Power gets its juice from feeding off of another source of energy.  Limiting power like thoughts have a, “I’m better, smarter, more beautiful, more creative, more…. than they are” ring to them, lifting oneself up while putting someone else down. Or like “I’m not as good/smart/pretty/tall/thin/creative… as them”; putting oneself down while inflating another – possible putting them on a pedestal  for the sake of keeping oneself safe (and small).

True or real sourced power feeds off of the never ending abundant supply of potential and possibility that is freely available to all – and harms none! True power thoughts sound like “I can do this”, “I am enough”, “I am learning and growing” or “what is possible now?”  Notice how the focus is on the self – self acknowledging, self accepting and self motivating. When we don’t include the ‘other’ in our own meaning, we neither puff them up nor knock them down, the meaning you give is about YOU. Other people will assign their own meaning to a shared event and it will be about them.  As tempting as it is to take another person’s meaning personally – it serves us to remember that it isn’t.    

If reality is an illusion, what illusion do you want to create as your reality?

We can’t go back and change the ‘facts’ of the past; we need to accept the facts as they are. What we can do is go back and change the meaning or story that we’ve made up about our past. Doing so, changes the impact and influence the past is having on our lives in the present and going forward.

Let’s take the example of being laid off from a job due to restructuring; many of us have had this sort of experience at least once.  The feeling of being laid off doesn’t usually feel great – even when it’s what we’ve secretly (or not so secretly) been wishing for, actually being asked to leave the building or to being escorted off the premises can sting. Far too often after this sort of experience I’ve heard people make up stories like “I wasn’t appreciated, someone was out to get me, I must have something wrong – all these sort of ‘meanings’ can leave one feeling rejected –again, not a pleasant feeling. They can also leave a person feeling disempowered, which is NOT a resourceful state to be in when looking of  new employment or planning your next steps.

What we need to do in such a case is separated the facts from the fiction. This actually happened to me in 2003 – I was laid off from my banking job without cause. And even though I was able to COMPLETELY recognize how I had consciously participated in creating the experience, on the day it un-expectantly happened, it stung! I told myself a whole much of *BS* that I needed to later retract. The FACTS were that I was no longer employed. I had been told I was laid off without cause, meaning  I had not done anything wrong – it served me best to believe that.  It was not where I wanted to stay career wise and I had already been working towards a new career. Those were the facts.  The story that served me without belittling anyone else (or myself) is that I needed to be let go, so that I could focus on the career I really wanted for myself. That if this was happening now, it must be time! One door had closed forcing me to walk through the other door that had already been opened. When I attach that story to the experience of being laid off, it feels empowering and promising – a bit scary for sure, however in an exciting way.

Changing the meaning of a past event may not necessarily erase the one you had previously assigned to it.  When I recall hearing the words and being escorted out of the branch, a slight sting still remains. I now use that feeling as a trigger that reminds me of my power to “choose” the story I remember… guess which one I chose?

We humans do tend to be creatures of habit; choosing a more empowering meaning or reinforcing a new story can take time. Be kind to yourself as you work on retraining your mind to more regularly tap into potential and possibility while harming none, the source of true power, when assigning meaning to life’s events.

Re-write the meaning of your past and become the hero/heroine of your own life’s journey.

Awakening the Energy of Your Core - Video

Back in February  Your Stage  put ME in the spotlight to share and experience Awakening to the Energy of Your Core!

Dream Dump

 

http://www.josephinewall.co.uk/

This year as  we get ready to enter 2012, feels like a good time to do some heavy duty  clearing. Time for a “Dream Dump”!  I  know, I know, I’m the coach. I’m the one who’s suppose to help you connect to  your dreams, bring them to life, and here I am suggesting you “dump” them.

The world as we’ve known it is continuing to change right  before our eyes. We are living in a time when being empowered, living  consciously and conscientiously, making choices that are aligned with the  wellbeing of our planet and all of its inhabitants, has (thankfully) become  more important than pursuing the frivolous life. Yet many of us still have the  energy of the ‘dreams’ of our past, based on a less congruent way of living,  pulling at us, having us sometimes feel at odds with… well, with ourselves. Do  you ever feel yourself ‘knowing’ what the right thing to do is yet you  experience yourself doing something different?  This is an indication that you may be operating under the influence of  an old, outdated ‘dream’.

The sort of dreams that I’m referring to  include the ones we’ve imagined about how life “should” be, as well as the  stories we’ve made up about the life we’ve had. They include the perceived  nightmares and demons of our past that keep us from seeing beyond our struggles  and failures. They include the fantasies we’ve made up about how people in our  lives should be (versus accepting who they are), the unmet expectations we’ve
had of them and of the events that have sometimes lead to disappointments and  feelings of betrayal. This sort of energy keeps us anchored to a disempowered  version of ourselves, others and potential.

In order to make ALL of who you are available for the new,  you need to get rid of ALL who you were - including your old DREAMS. As
mythologist Joseph Campbell puts it,  “We must let go of  the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”  

Dream Dump Exercise:

Grab a piece of paper and write your name at the top, followed  by Dream Dump. Mine looks like this:

Kim’s Dream Dump

 

Take all of  the dreams and nightmares you’ve made up, as well as the ones you’ve inherited  from your family and society, and dump them on the page in writing.

To help you prepare for the dream dump, I’ve included a  Wheel of Life. As you consider each spoke in the wheel, ask yourself these two
questions:

1. Is  there a dream (my own or one I’ve inherited) that has not come to fruition
   in this area?
2. What  are the dreams and nightmares I’ve made up in this area?

For example: Career: Dream of  working with partners.  I’ve made up that  I need to work with others, that I can’t be successful on my own. I’ve made up  that I don’t work well with others, that I have to do it all by myself.

You may find that some of the  dreams you hold contradict each other (like mine above). This is completely  normal and a good reason to dump them ALL.  One of the side effects to doing this exercise is that you may uncover  the source of many of your internal conflicts. Becoming conscious of them will  empower you to choose more congruently in the New Year.

Remember to include all that  you’ve made up about others and yourself – stuff like “I’m not good enough”,  “It’s not safe to be myself with others”, “I can’t trust him” or “She’ll never  understand me”. It is amazing the stuff we can make up from a single  experience.

Now, I realize that what I’m  about to suggest next is going to sound counter intuitive however, I want you  to ‘dump’ all the good dreams too. Hear me out; imagine going to your favorite  restaurant and discovering they’ve taken your favorite dessert – say chocolate  mousse – off the menu. Now you’re forced to either try a new dessert, or go  without. You decide to order the amaretto cheesecake and you love it!  As you’re eating your new favorite dessert, inspiration hits!  What if you got the recipes for both desserts  and combined them? You’d have an amaretto chocolate mousse cheesecake. Oh  my!  Can you imagine how scrumptious that  would be?

For some of us this is not going  to be an easy breezy exercise. Personally, I was surprised at how challenging  it was to come up with a dream dump to use here as an example. For others, the  idea of completing this exercise may not resonate at all - trust yourself.  The intention of this exercise is to free  ourselves up from the past, so that more of who we are, and more of what is  possible will avail itself as we move into consciously creating 2012 and  beyond.

When you feel like all of your  dreams have been dumped, destroy them!  If you can safely do so, burn them; if not, shred them.

Once the dreams are dumped and  destroyed, then what?     

Enjoy Your Dream Vacation!

 

Once you’ve dumped and destroyed all of your dreams – breath deep!!  Take the rest of the year to remain empty and allow the festivities of the
holidays to dance in the space you’ve created. Similarly to taking a vacation  from work, you’re taking a vacation from your dreams.  Schedule January 1^st 2012 as the  “return to dreaming” date, the day when you can start contemplating about  what’s next, allowing your mind to wonder through all the potential within you  and around you – to make it all up again from scratch… but until then, bask in  the vast expansiveness your dream dump has created and enjoy your  ‘dream  vacation’.

 

© 2011 All Rights Reserved Conscious Creation

Patches 1992-2011

Dear Patches

Thank you for the joy and love you brought to my life. From the day I found you at the Humane Society, full of nippy spunk and energy, our loving connection grew. Your purrs that soothed, snuggles that warmed, licks of affection and growls of protection are going to be missed. So many fond memories and soulful, heartfelt moments.

While my eyes cry, my heart feels the joy and happiness you get to now experience at the Rainbow Bridge. I’ll be awhile, so enjoy yourself and your regained freedom. And feel free to come back in another form of cat or dog and we can pick up where we left off in sharing the Love.

Love you my dear feline friend. I’m more having experienced your Love.
Kim

Guilt's Gift

Guilt and shame get such a bad rap. I do understand how it may not be everyone’s cup of tea, it doesn’t usually make us feel very good; it makes us feel small, shallow… like we want crawl under something and just disappear. Guilt and shame are awful feelings to have… however if they can serve a purpose are they really all that bad?

I use to hate guilt – I’d tell people I have no use for it! However in spite of my attempts to reject it – I kept feeling it. Its perseverance has helped me to recognize the gifts of guilt and shame.

Guilt has served me well over the years. It has helped me to be a better a friend, to myself and others. It’s helped me recognize when I wasn’t living my values or when I was doing something for the wrong reason. It has made me kinder, more patient and understanding. Guilt serves as a moral compass, pointing me towards how to be a better person when I forget… and we all forget every now and then. I’m very grateful to guilt, for being the kick in the butt I’ve needed when I’ve slacked off on my exercise routine, the inspiration I’ve needed to write a new blog post (like this one  ) and the empowerment I’ve needed when I’ve been tempted to give my power away to someone or something outside of myself.

Making friends with guilt is one of the best things I’ve ever done. Now when it creeps in – and oooh I know the feeling so well that I can usually sense when it’s been triggered even the slightest – when it creeps in, I pay attention. I ask myself: “What am I compromising in this moment? Which one of my values am I stepping on? What is my intention? What do I really want to do or say? What is most important to me?” Or if the feeling has come in “after – the – fact” then I’ll ask myself: “What was my intention at the time? Was that the best I could do in the moment, given what I knew then? Would I do it again? What would I do differently next time?”
Most importantly… I ask myself whether or not I need to apologize to someone and if so, I do. As a friend, guilt and shame can make you think before choosing and reflect after the fact to learn and grow from experience.

Guilt helps me take responsibility for myself, to be responsible of me and who I am choosing to be. By working with the feelings of guilt or shame when they come up, instead of trying to deny their existence or push them away, I give myself the opportunity of expressing the better version of myself in that moment.

Yes – guilt feels awful and can make you want to curl up and disappear – however if you let it, it will show you its gift and help you stand tall and shine. Your choice!

Year End RItual

 This is a two part exercise. First we acknowledge and celebrate ALL that you’ve accomplished in 2010. Take the time to acknowledging yourself, your efforts, your contribution, your successes and wins and even the perceived failures as there were gems to be gleaned from them too which makes them a success! Hopefully you’ve been expressing self gratitude all year round – and if not, this is the time to really let yourself have it!! Celebrate!!

In part two, you get to clean up any unfinished business – whether that is on a physical or emotional level. I love what Caroline Myss advices on wounded stories – tell it three times and then move on! I see the end of the year as a good time to consciously move on; to release any disempowering stories and the emotions connected to them that affect your energy so as not to drag them into the New Year. Sometimes letting go of the story and feelings IS as simple as deciding to do so, while other times it isn’t as simple as that. When it isn’t that easy, there is often more to learn from the experience, for our own personal growth and for that reason I have included some exercises that help facilitate the release of as much as possible now.

Ideally, you complete the exercises prior to the year’s end, consciously entering the New Year full of gratitude and ready to focus on what you want to consciously create in 2011.

In summary, part one is about reviewing and celebrating the year. This is an opportunity to recall and possibly gain further awareness or insights from the events of 2010. Part two is about releasing, forgiving and expressing gratitude for all of the events that made up 2010.
The exercise may take you from one hour to as much time as you need to complete.
So go get your 2010 journal, diary, agenda and anything else that will help jog your memory of the past year as well as a pen and paper. Get nice and comfy, creating a sacred environment for yourself - light some candles, burn some incense and have some tea, wine or favorite beverage.

Part One
The Year’s Review

Review the events of the year and take some time now to gain whatever more you can from the experiences. We all know the value of hind sight – time and distance provide a new perspective from which we can glean more insights from the more challenging and memorable events of our life.

Starting with January of 2010 ask yourself the following questions as you work your way through the year.
• What were the key events of 2010
• What did you learn as a result of these experiences? What else?
• Who was involved in your life this year and in what capacities? What part of you did they reflect/mirror? What part of you, reflected in them, did you accept or reject?
• What and who assisted in your growth this year?
• What obstacles have you overcome?
• What goals did you accomplish?
• How did you contribute yourself and talents this year? To whom?
• How were other people impacted by your contribution to their lives over the past year? (Be generous here!!)
• What goals did you set and did not yet accomplish? Are you complete with this goal? Does it still align with your values? Is it time to let it go or recommit with some alterations perhaps?
• How did you stretch beyond your perceived abilities - meaning do things you didn't think you could or would have done in prior years.
• How are “you” different from who “you” were in January of 2010

Cleaning up 2010
If you find yourself having any unpleasant emotional responses in respect to any of the events of the past year, here are some methods to use that will serve to guide you towards the core of these emotions helping you release them. No need to do them all and doing a combination may be valuable. The variety is offered to honor that one method does not necessarily fit all!
1. Ask yourself: What is still triggering me? What more can I learn from this event that I simply haven’t recognized yet? Take a step back and look at the experience objectively, as if it happened to someone else. See yourself in the situation, as if you are looking at a movie. From this position, what do you notice that is new, different? What else can you now learn from this perspective that wasn’t as clear before? It may help to discuss the situation with someone who wasn’t involved.

2. Close your eyes, center yourself, take a few deep breaths… that’s right… right from the diaphragm. Picture the person that you still have an emotion towards in your mind’s eye, or think of them and feel their vibration. Ask them “What other message(s) do you have to offer me?” Listen. Then go within and ask if there is a message you have for them. Listen. If it feels appropriate to communicate a message directly to the other person, do your best to do so prior to the year’s end; by voice, in-person or by writing. If it does not feel appropriate to do so, write it down and then tear it up or burn it.

If you did get a message for them, ask yourself how this message could possibly assist you as well. (often the advice we get for others applies to us as well ;) )

3. Close your eyes, center yourself, take a few deep breaths… that’s right…right from the diaphragm.
Go over the experience in your mind. Notice the emotions that are arising within you.
Are you being reminded of any other past event? If yes, what are the similarities? Can you recall any events just prior to the one you are exploring? What you are doing here is making a connection to how you participated in attracting the experience and you may possibly recognize a pattern. What you learn from the experience now, may assist you in not repeating the pattern again or to at least recognize if it shows up again.

4. Write it out. Write out the experience and your emotions. While writing ask yourself questions to lead you to more understanding, such as; What does this emotion tell me about how I really felt? If I knew of another experience that had the same feeling connected with it, what might it be? How would I have interpreted this event without this feeling? What am I making the feelings mean? What were the facts? What am I making the facts mean? What else could they mean? Is the feeling connected to the facts or what I made the facts mean? What happens emotionally when I change the meaning of the facts? Continue with any questions that come to you until you feel complete.

This final exercise is powerfully effective in connecting with any remaining emotions such as hurt, regret, disappointment, betrayal or even anger that you may still be feeling towards a person. Over the past year many of us had some more challenging experiences that contributed to our growth, however may have included painful circumstances in order to facilitate our evolutionary journey. These included experiences that may have felt like you’d been betrayed, abandoned, lied to, deceived or just left you confused. If when you think of the person(s) involved and are still feeling like authentic forgiveness is a big leap, then this final exercise may provide the deeper insights and lesson to free yourself, allowing forgiveness to heal and release. I do feel a responsibility to add a word of caution before completing this one:
Do not complete this exercise if you are healing emotions from sexual abuse, physical abuse or rape. This exercise is not to be completed for extremely strong emotions that a person may have from more traumatic experiences, where they may have been harmed physically or deeply psychologically. If you have had such an experience and are looking to release the emotions associated with such traumatic events, or if you are feeling emotionally or mentally unwell, please speak to your psychologist or a licensed therapist.

Reflection Exercise
For this exercise you’ll need a mirror and a candle. You can either stand or sit in front of one, ensuring you’ll be in a comfortable position to complete the exercise.
Light the candle, positioning it within easy view, while consciously connecting to your higher self, god self, greater self – that part of you that is loving and wise beyond reason.
Once you feel this connection, look into the mirror and think about the person whom you still are not feeling at peace with, that you want and are ready to let go of.
Thinking of this person, while looking into your own eyes, imagine that you are looking into their eyes. Notice how you feel as you think of this person and see them in your reflection.
Whatever emotion you are feeling towards them, you are also feeling towards a part of you.
Ask: “ What part of me is this feeling about?” Listen for the answer. If the answer feels incomplete, simply take a deep breath in and out, remaining focused on seeing their face and eyes as you are looking at yours, connected to your greater self and either repeat the question or request “Tell me more.”
When you feel you’ve connected to the deeper insight or lesson, ask: “How do I let this feeling go? What is required of me?”
Wait for the answer.
Remember all choices are yours. Follow the guidance of your greater self. If for any reason you do not feel able to fulfill it’s (your) request, continue the conversation by stating so and ask how else…. Continue conversing with your greater self, while maintaining eye contact in the mirror and imagining it is the other person whose eyes you are gazing into.
Ask; “Is there anything else I need, in order to be at peace with …. (name of person) and the part of me they represent?”
Listen.
Continue asking your greater self questions until you experience looking at into your eyes, imagining them looking back at you, and feeling either at peace, love, forgiveness, or neutral.
Once this feeling is present, thank them for the gift of serving you this way – providing you can do so authentically.
Look away from the mirror.
Blow out the candle with a feeling of gratitude for you connection to your greater self.
Exercise is complete.

If you need to do this exercise for more than one relationship, then I recommend that you complete each one fully as mentioned above. Get up and have a drink of water and then return to the spot and start again with the lighting of the candle. This is to ensure the connection to the prior person has been completed so that the next will have your complete energy and attention.
If none of these exercises work for some of the experiences, that is fine. It may not be the right time for you to be complete with the experience. Accept that you have done the best you can for now and trust that when the time is right, resolution will happen in the best way possible.

Part two
Once you have reviewed the year, acknowledge in writing all that you are grateful for, and all you are ready to release and/or forgive. Be sure to include your accomplishments, goals achieved, growth stretches, and obstacles overcome.

Release and Forgive
In respect to all the events and people involved, complete the following sentences:
I bless and release my experience of these events........ (list the various events)
I bless and forgive and release (name of person) Thank you for your active participation in my life.
Also take this time to release any outdated beliefs or attitudes that no longer serve you.
I bless and release my past need to……. (name belief or attitude you are releasing) I am grateful that it has served me in the past and brought me to this point in my life.

Celebrate with Gratitude
I believe we are all aware of the power of gratitude! Focus on your heart center, allowing it to fill with love and appreciation as you complete the following sentences for each event or person (including you) you wish to express gratitude for:

I am grateful for........ (brief summary of event)
I am grateful for……. (name of person and briefly why).
I am grateful to have had ……. (name the impact of your contribution)…. impact on….. (person, people or system you impacted).
Once complete, if you are able to safely do so, burn these papers with the intention that doing so symbolizes the rejuvenating transformation that fire brings, promoting new growth! If you are unable to do so safely, you can shred them by hand feeling the release and gratitude as you do so.

YEAH!!!! You have just created a vibrant, clear space within yourself having released the energy of 2010, creating space which can now be filled with your dreams and aspirations for 2011! The energy of gratitude that you allow to trail behind you, will naturally draw more for you to be grateful for in the coming year. .

Take some time in the New Year to articulate what you want in your life, for your life and how you want to show up in 2011. What do you want to accomplish, contribute and how do you want to grow? Celebrate bringing in the year by create a fun collage that reflects your aspirations for 2011.

Thank you for having contributed to my life in 2010 and I wish you all the best as you consciously participate in co-creating 2011!

© 2010 All Rights Reserved Conscious Creation

http://myemail.constantcontact.com/News-from-Conscious-Creation.html?soid=1101585269748&aid=fiXTJNxKlyo

http://myemail.constantcontact.com/News-from-Conscious-Creation.html?soid=1101585269748&aid=fiXTJNxKlyo

Coaching With Compassion

 Coaching is a very magical experience.  And research is continuing to uncover scientific proof - very exciting!

Coaching with compassion can 'light up' human thoughts

ScienceDaily (2010-11-19) -- Researchers have used an fMRI to document reactions in the human brain to compassionate and critical coaching methods. Students tended to activate areas of the brain associated with openness to learning when working with coaches who inspired them. Students tended to shut down when coaches were perceived as judgmental. ... > read full article

Stop doing.....

I just came across this great question while reading the description of Marshall Goldsmith’s book, “What Got You Here Won’t Get You There”.

“Instead of your usual “To-Do” list, start your “To-Stop” list. Ask yourself, “What am I willing to change right now?” “.

People hire me as their coach to discuss the changes they want to make in their lives. Included in these discussions are often the details of what they no longer want in their lives, such as what they no longer want to be doing. But then we usually go on to discuss what they will do instead… adding to their “to do” lists more and more things to do. I really like Goldsmith’s suggestion of a “to stop” list. To me this means meeting myself exactly where I am in the moment – doing something perhaps unproductive or unconstructive – and doing the very next smallest step… which is STOPPING! I love it! Adding to a “to do” list sometimes ends up contributing to the overwhelming amount of things we already have to do, where as a “to stop” list feels more like taking away from the list of things to do - it's a relief! It may seem like a simply enough reframe, however if it feels better, chances are you’re going to end up with better results.

Here is an invitation to work with Goldsmith’s suggestion, with a twist of Kim (I haven’t actually picked up the book yet so I’m making up the structure). At the end of the day, take some time to reflect. Was there anything that happened during the day that you really would have liked to have seen turn out differently? Perhaps during a conversation you found yourself reacting in a way that triggered a chain of emotional reactions, directing the conversation off topic or to an unwanted result. Or maybe there was a project that didn’t turn or as planned or wasn’t completed on time. Whatever the situation, ask yourself, “What specifically did I do that contributed to this outcome?” Take a few moments to reflect on the thinking pattern, behavior or action that contributed to the experience and acknowledge how you specifically participated in the resulting outcome. You may want use a journal for the process or simply spend time contemplating the experience. Next ask, “What will I ‘stop doing’ to help this result to not happen again”. Add this to your “to stop” list. Don’t worry about what you’re going to do instead, by stopping what you were doing, by default you’ll have to do something else – even if that something else is nothing. Since your intention is to not experience the previous result again, when you stop doing what you did that participated in its happening, chances are that you’ll naturally do something that will lead to the result you want!

Myself, I’ve been noticing lately that I’m not as productive as I’d like to be. I participate in being unproductive by letting myself get distracted by surfing the web; hopping from one social site to the next checking out posts, looking to see if someone commented on a post I made or if there is a new post I want to comment on, checking my email, Googling whatever just popped into my mind… anybody relate to what I’m saying? I’ve added “I will stop the distractive behavior of web surfing while working on a task” to my “to stop” list. This post is a result of that commitment – I just resisted the urge to click on my email when I heard its familiar “ping” a moment ago. However, I do have to admit – this post is a result of getting sidetracked from what I was originally doing… which I’ll be getting back to now :)

Let me know how it goes!

The Magic of Acceptance and Contest Judging

“A little confused about this "Best Spiritual Book contest". I keep getting emails and FB posts from authors - some I know and some I don't - blatantly bribing me and everyone else on their lists, to vote for their book. Isn't this the kind of tactic many people scorn politicians for using.... and this is a "spiritual" book contest? Whoever the winner will be, the win will be a reflection of the votes they were able to solicit, not a reflection of the actual book. Am I missing something? I feel really judgmental about this.”

Over the weekend, I posted the above comment on my Facebook page, transparently admitting my confusion and judgment. A good friend who resonated with my observation encouraged me to not judge myself for the discernment I was expressing, which was a very kind comment. However what I noticed was that the moment I expressed my judgment, thereby acknowledging and accepting the feeling, any “self judgment” that had momentarily crept in, magically disappeared. Through my acceptance of it, I was immediately able to observe my feeling of judgment for what it was, a feeling, and I became more curious about how I felt. This curiosity lead me to check out was the contest’s website to learn more about it.

There, I discovered that my impression that the results of the contest would be a reflection of the votes a contestant was able to solicit actually was one of the intentions of the contest. The whole purpose of the first round in this contest was to teach contestants how to make themselves and their message more visible. This first round, had NOTHING to do with anything the authors may have written – the main intention of this round was to narrow down the contestants to the top 250 authors who could solicit the most votes.

On the site it states: “In this first round the authors rally the support of those they know and learn the art of promoting their message and book. This provides the author with a real life experience of publishing and promoting a book.” http://www.nexttopspiritualauthor.com/ By reading the website, I learnt that one of the main intentions of the contest was to help authors learn more about how to market themselves so that they can be more successful as authors. The more I read about the contest, the more I can appreciate what it is all about. James Twyman shares this about the competition on his personal website http://www.jamestwyman.com/: “The competition, which includes a people’s choice element, will help to establish a publishing path for an emerging spiritual author. Beyond that, all participants – winner or not – will be allowed to participate in an eight-month home study program that will provide them with the skills they need to become a successful author.”

So, all contestants are winning the 8 month home study program - I love it when everyone’s a winner!!

While I still stand by that I don’t care much for being excessively spammed and bribed by people I don’t know, I now understand that for many of the contestants who emailed me, doing so was an exercise to help them stretch out of their comfort zones and that I can support.

Even with the understanding of how the contest is designed, I was still curious about the judgment that got triggered by the numerous emails and posts I received. Another friend made a comment to my post, sharing that she was feeling out the energy of the emails/requests and discerning whether she felt the person was coming from a place of love and generosity or personal desire. When I tuned in, I felt that many were coming from both, and I didn’t really have a problem with either. It is normal for people to desire winning a contest; to desire having their message be heard and understandable to desire wanting that so much they are willing to give stuff away (bribe) in exchange for votes in the hopes of possibly winning a publishing contract especially when that is what they are being encouraged to do. As I acknowledged this new feeling that was now associated with the contest, I wondered how it was that the feeling of judgment got triggered first, and not the more generous energy that I can sense now?

As I continued to curiously sit with this inquiry, I realized that the idea of “bribing for votes” triggers a feeling of dishonesty. I’m immediately reminded of stories I’ve heard through the media where individuals used such tactics to gain votes that would win them positions of power, instead of qualifying for the position due to the true value they intend on bringing to the position. I’m noticing that whenever I witness the tactic of “bribing for a vote” being uses, the past energy of dishonesty is triggered and I immediately become suspicious of whoever is using it. The more my suspicious I become the more judgmental I become – and it that state, I’m not very open.

This is what responding from autopilot is like – which most of us do often, each and every day. We react to situations based on past experiences that get anchored into us. When something happens that is similar to a past experience, it triggers the associated anchored response, which is easy to go along with because it’s already been proven. When this happens with my coaching clients, after acknowledging and accepting how they feel, I ask questions to peek their curiosity, which often encourages them to seek out more information, leading to new understandings and perspectives to discern from. And this was exactly what I did for myself. By first acknowledging and accepting how I felt, not making myself wrong for it, I ignited my curious nature which then opened me up to see more of what is there to see.

As I realized I was reacting to a past association to a tactic that felt dishonest, I wondered how I would have responded to these emails if my first or prevalent association with “bribing for votes” was connected an experience that felt honest or generous. If my past association to the tactic was that I’d gained something of value in return for a vote and if all my vote did, was help someone be seen for the value they had to offer, how differently might I have responded to the numerous requests for votes I received? I imagine that if my overriding association to “bribing for votes” was from that perspective, I probably would have been inclined to vote for each person I resonated with. Or I may have simply been inclined to support them all for having the courage to step out of their comfort zones to support themselves in getting their message out.

As a result of putting my own judgment out there to be seen and heard, not only did I gain clarity about this particular contest – I also learnt more about what was at the core of the resistance I’ve been feeling towards other marketing strategies that I’ve had a hard time aligning with. I realize that most of my judgments of other marketing methods are based on negative associations. Not sure if I’ll be jumping on their band wagon anytime soon, however if there is something there for me, I’m now in a new perspective from which to discern my alignment to it from and it feels… open :)

To all of the contestants that made it to the second round – congratulations on your well earned success and the best of luck to you all.

Any Regrets?

A friend on facebook, Michael Murphy, posted this question today "Is it possible to live without regret? Do you agree or disagree and why?" Here's my response which followed someone's who thought that YES it was possible, because we always have choice and we made the choice.

I agree, it is all about Choice! Regret can also be a choice. I think that if we've made a choice that we didn't align with 100%, that in time we may experience flutterings of regret. That isn't such a bad thing, it's what we DO with it that can potentially harm us.

A fluttering of regret can happen when we get a peek into a "what if" of an alternative past choice. Good news is that choice is always available to us. We can choose how long we stay in the energy that the "what if" brought up, how far we take it and what direction we take it in. Because we can choose our thoughts and perspectives, we can choose what we do with regret when it flutters in.

So is it possible to live without regret? Sure, I believe everything is possible. The question is, is it probable? For many people - no, and that doesn't have to be such a bad thing. Our natural ability to choose can deflate or inflate the impact of regret. We simply need to remember that we can choose, and that we can always choose again, and again and again....

What Is So Difficult About NO?

Do you have a hard time saying no? I do.

Whenever my honey, a colleague, friend or even a stranger asks me something that I need or want to say no to, I find it emotionally challenging. I’ve been really curious about this lately – why it feels so awkward, and how lately, I’ve even felt resentment creep in for being put in the position of having to say No, as if the other person should know better than to ask – and YES I know how irrational that is!! I don’t usually have an issue with my decision initially; I know what I’m willing and able to do or accept at any given time, and what I’m not. However, when it comes to having say that little two letter word – N O – sometimes I buckle and kick myself later for not listening to myself – or it comes out all icky and not at all in a way I feel good about.

Whether or not you can relate personally to what I’m saying, I imagine that you at least know someone, or that you know someone who knows someone, who couldn’t say NO to save their own life. They can have a completely full agenda, and when asked to take on yet another project, instead of saying: "No, I’m full thank you!", “Yes” is the automatic response comes out of their mouth. Know anybody like that – intimately perhaps? Or maybe, you relate more to NO = rejection? Regardless of which side of the equation you are on, if NO equals’ rejection, you’ll either feel rejected or that you are rejecting – neither of which feels good.

So I figure, if it feels so hard to say NO, then I won’t. Instead, I’m going to say Yes – to everything!

What I realized is this; when I’m feeling awkward or even resentful with the NO, my focus is on exactly that – what I’m saying NO to and the two letter word itself. What I’m not focused on is what I’m saying YES to, by default. In reality, whenever we say NO to something, we are actually saying YES to something else. And likewise, when we say YES to something, we are saying NO to something else. What often feels hard for me is the amount of energy and focus I’ve been putting on the response of NO. If saying NO aligns with my own agenda or plans, honors my values, feels congruent and right for me, then the NO is actually a Yes to ME and what is important to ME.

My new game plan is this… to focus on what I am saying YES to, and then to respond from the perspective of YES.

I started writing this post a couple of days ago, and since then I’ve attracted a number of opportunities to use this new strategy. One decision has been whether or not to take on another board position. The helper in me was tempted to say yes, but then I realized that would be saying no to being as effective and efficient in my other commitments and that is not OK with me. I am saying YES to my personal standards, and YES to leaving the space open for someone who can do it well. That feels good.

Another example was being asked if I thought something was a good idea and a straight NO (because I didn’t think it was) would have been a quick response, however, that felt stiff and inflexible. Instead, I took then the time to recognize what the YES was to, and then I expressed myself from that perspective (which aligned with the bigger picture). It felt supportive and good to express myself in that way and the YES was well received.

I’m going to keep this up and if you are like me, and you find it hard to say NO, I invite you to challenge
yourself to find a way of responding to all requests made of you for the next week with a YES. And I’m not suggesting that you simply get wishy washy with your NOs, but to focus on what you are saying YES to, and then to craft your responses from that perspective first. Remember that the YES is often about your own agenda, goals, integrity, self care, personal balance, values, or the bigger picture of whatever the request is about. Saying yes to these feel good – saying NO to helping out… doesn’t always feel so good. So focus on what feels good.

If you take on this challenge, I’d love hear how you do with it. And please remember, while you are working with this challenge, if someone makes a request of you, and inside you authentically feel, 100%, that you need to respond with a clear and unmistakable NO – then please do so, knowing that that NO is really a loud YES to yourself!!!

Winter and Spring Workshops with The Ottawa Catholic School Board

Hey - I'm offering a number of workshops through the Ottawa Catholic School Board for Continuing Education. Registration for the March dates ends soon - so if interested contact them right away.

Pattern Busting – Create the Patterns that Lead to a Life You Want

Learn how to recognize your unwanted or unhealthy patterns. Participants will identify the thoughts, belief and values that are running the patterns and which one(s) need to shift to create more desirable outcomes. You'll learn a number of Kim's Pattern Busting self coaching tools, which will open up your peripheral, enabling you to see all of the possibilities and options that are available to you in any moment! Learning this tool will empower you to create life enhancing patterns!
Winter and Spring Dates 2010
9:30 am - 2:00 pm
Saturday March 6, 2010 or Saturday May 8, 2010

The Value of Money & You

How you value and treat your finances is a direct reflection of how you value yourself! During this workshop you will identify what is most important to you - your personal values - as well as how you truly feel about money. You'll break through the limiting beliefs, behaviours, and attitudes that have been sabotaging your prosperity and strengthen your relationship to the value of you. Aligning your inner worth with your outer worth will naturally result in more prosperous and abundant living.
Winter and Spring Dates 2010
9:30 am - 2:00 pm
Saturday March 27, 2010 or Saturday April 17, 2010

Conscious Creation Group Coaching
Create a balanced and fulfilling life this year by working with a professionally certified Life Coach. Within the first few classes you will uncover your core values, set S.M.A.R.T. goals and create a plan of action aligned with your values. Then in the following weeks you'll receive the coaching you need to keep you accountable and true to yourself. With the help of your coach, you will break through any self-sabotaging unconscious patterns or limiting beliefs ensuring success in achieving your outcomes. Class is open for 10-12 participants - so enroll early!
Spring Dates 2010
7:00 pm- 9:30 pm
Wednesdays from April 21 – June 9, 2010


Please note the above workshops are being offered through the Ottawa Catholic School Board. Please visit their site at www.fallconnections.com for registration details or call 613-228-3338.

Year End Ritual and Emotional Intentions for 2010

I really wanted to send this out earlier in the week, to give you all the time to complete the year end exercises prior to the end of 2009 – but I just wasn’t feeling it, it wasn’t flowing. So I decided to investigate what was happening cosmically that could be affecting my flow – and it then it made sense.

This year is ending with some pretty wild and conflicting energy. While the end of the year is usually a powerful time for setting intentions, this year being amplified by a full moon – an eclipsed blue moon at that – we also have the energies of two planetary retrogrades compromising our efforts; Mercury and Mars. Mercury’s retrograde influence messes up all means of communications, which includes the communication we send out (goals/intentions) as well what we receive – inspiration and messages. While Mars’ retrograde influence is stirring some our darker emotions such as repressed frustrations and anger – not a good mix for planning the New Year. However I do feel it is still a great time for releasing and clearing space – both the inner and outer. The effects of the blue moon and eclipse will still amplify our intentions; I just wouldn’t be putting too much energy into getting too specific about them yet. A few weeks will bring more clarity and you may be inspired into a whole new direction.

To really make the most of this energetic potpourri, this will be my ritual this year which I offer to you as well:

Sometime today , (or whatever day you are reading this) write out a list of all that you intend to release from 2009 and the other 10 years that made up this decade (to top it all off, we are also completing a decade ). It feels important at this time to be releasing it all; the good, the bad and the neutral – all we are grateful for and all we simply wish to leave behind. Write it all out. What patterns and beliefs have held on to you? Feel the appreciation you have for their contribution to your life and let them be. By releasing them all, you create space for the beliefs and patterns that will align with your intentions for 2010 to come in. In order to continue moving forward, co-creating a sustainable world, I feel it is important to continually be releasing for renewal, in order to maintain harmony with the earth.

Then, I invite you to safely burn these pages. Optimally, if you get a chance to do this today, then this evening go outside and burn them under the blue full moon. Allow the alchemic process of fire to transform the words on the paper.

Complete this ritual by setting three emotional intentions for 2010. Make sure they are personal expressions of how you want to be feeling in 2010, knowing that who you are will be reflected in the world around you. For example, you may intend freedom, joy and peace or influence, peace and enthusiasm or simply, joy, joy and more joy! With the two retrogrades going on, I’m not feeling inclined to get too specific yet in planning which activities will result in my intended emotions for 2010. Past experience has proven to me that by setting the emotional intentions, and projecting them into a future time space, that the events and experiences between now and then will naturally unfold and result in the intended feeling, so that is good enough for me. I don’t need to know “exactly how” right now, it will flow naturally.

Once you have your three emotional intentions, close your eyes and imagine yourself on December 31st, 2010, looking back on the year and feeling that way about the year. Imagine feeling that way throughout the year as well. Do this for a few minutes – possibly between the minutes of 11:58pm tonight and 12:02 am New Year’s Day. If that timing doesn’t work – anytime will be great!

Later on the in month of January, once I can harness the communicative energies of Mercury again, I’ll sit down with my wise counsel and get some more clear direction for the upcoming year.

The essence of this ritual for me is to intentional and gratefully release for renewal, knowing the wisdom of it all is a part of me and to set emotional intentions for the New Year.

And of course – to celebrate it all with some bubbly!!
Happy Happy Happy 2010

Attracting Miracles

I love setting an intention, forgetting that I’ve done so and then being surprised as I experience the magic of how it manifests as a reality!

This is exactly what happened last week while on vacation in Sedona, Arizona. As Daniel and I were venturing out on a vortex trek to Bell Rock one morning he ask me; “What do you want to attract today?” I smiled and joyfully giggled “I want to attract miracles!” Then we continued our hike towards Bell Rock, enjoying the trail and forgetting all about this intention until we met up with the first of many miracles we’d attract that day.

For both of us, this was our first trip to this spiritually energy infused landscape, and while we knew there were a number of energy vortexes amid the massive red rocks, we were not yet intimately familiar with each by name. At one point of our journey towards Bell Rock, I had a strong feeling that we were heading in the wrong direction. Some of the signs were vague, letting us know we were on the “Bell Rock Path” however with no indication as to which direction the intended destination was in. It was a day of trusting ourselves to rely on the less obvious signs as appose to the more direct ones, which proved to be somewhat elusive. We noticed another path which also confirmed it as a “Bell Rock Path” and decide to take it. Soon it proved to be leading us closer to the two larger of the red rock masses in the area.

As we got close to the base of the first large rock, we still were not in agreement as to which it was. I thought the more rounded rock on the right was Bell Rock, and Daniel thought it was the closer one, which was later confirmed to be the Courthouse Butte, by a cyclist we met along the way – who would end up being my first miracle of the day.

At first glance I saw a man sitting on the ground, with his bike next to him taking a break from riding.

Then I noticed the glittering of metal and realized he possessed mechanical legs – not just one, but two. Immediately I was struck in awe of this man’s ability to ride a bike, however it was only after we continued on our journey toward Bell Rock that my eyes welled up as I realized that I had just experienced the miracle I had asked for. As a result of his life experience, this man had lost both of his natural legs and was living life, doing what he loved, with two artificial legs. We had encountered a walking, talking, cycling miracle!

The cyclist was also able to give us the time, which made us realize that we had yet to reach the base of Bell Rock even though we had been hiking for 2 hours and that it was time for lunch. Our options now were to skip lunch and continue the climb up Bell Rock or to return another day and make the climb. Since both of us had only eaten a very light breakfast, we opted to return another day. However that still left us with at least a 1.5 hour hike back to the car, so I asked for a more specific miracle next. I intended that we would meet someone to drive us back to our car otherwise we’d be eating lunch with dinner.

We walked to the parking lot at the base of Bell Rock to find someone to drive us to our car. (*Note – we had parked in a lot miles away from the base, not realizing there was one much closer, yet our experiences confirmed that this was no mistake due to our intention for the day!) There were a number of people around, however they were either just arriving at the site or had just come back to their car for a break. As we started our long trek back we met up with a group of people at the end of their hike. They were all members of a local hiking club, and while the ladies we approached were heading in the opposite direction of us, they assured us a couple of their friends were heading back to town and would be happy to drive us to our car. Within minutes we were getting into the back seat of a convertible BMW with two gentlemen who were delighted to have us be their good deed of the day! Very grateful for miracle #2!

Next we headed to the Airport for lunch, then to the Airport vortex site. There we met a couple who had been to these sites often and shared with us a known, but not easily found gem of a spot by Cathedral Rock. The key was to arrive there at the start of sunset to catch the beautiful reflection of the rock in a stream along the path. To get there, we had to know to cross over some logs at a certain place along the stream,

which I imagine many people would have missed. Our third miracle was meeting people to guide us to this breath enhancing view.

More miracles followed – and I’ll share them in another post.

As you set out on your journey called "today", intend what you want to attract, and when you ask for miracles, be prepared to be blessed in ways you never could have even imagined to ask for!

Persitent Messages!!

Here is a blog I enjoy visiting on Tuesday’s, for the author’s Tarot Tuesday’s. Every Tuesday Sheri picks a card and then offers her interpretation of it. She then encourages you to reflect on the card and discern it’s meaning for you. Today her card was from Doreen Virtue’s Archangel Oracle cards.

A great reminder card for me today - in case I wasn't getting of all the other hints the universe has been providing me lately. Claircognizance is my “clair” (or as I prefer to call it, my expanded sense) and I've been second guessing it a lot over the past year. As a result, the universe has been providing me with an abundance of opportunities to second guess my inner knowing just so I can experience the "I knew it" feeling ... great validation! When we simply follow your inner knowing, we often have to "trust" it was the right insight in the moment, because we have no way to prove what would have happened if we hadn't followed it.

As a conscious creator, I've been getting caught up in acknowledging the directive of my inner knowing and then wondering if I should be challenging myself to focus on creating what I “want” in spite of what I “know”.

Can I?

My experience has been, sometimes yes and sometimes not - again I need to remember to lean back into the inner knowing and trust the continued directive I receive as to whether or not it is in the best interest of all involved to consciously focus on influencing the outcome. To lean into the inner knowing is to effect change by harnessing the "Inner Power" and not from forced energy (as in the book Power VS Force by David Hawkins).
As the Serenity Prayer encourages, may we all have: "The strength to change what we can, accept what we can't change and may we all have the wisdom to know the difference".

What - Me Stressed???

Here is a note I wrote in response to Mary Allens Inner Peace Practice video - after you read please watch it!

Hi Mary - I just wanted to tell you how much I LOVE your new videos. Today's was exceptionally brilliant - and timely. Recently I've been informed by two different health care providers, that my stress level was affecting my thyroid and adrenals... and I didn't even realize I was experiencing stress. The first naturopath discovered this through a bio-feedback like technology (NES) and to be honest, I wasn't convinced of its accuracy because I didn't "get" that I was experiencing stress. Then yesterday, my new naturopath (my previous one moved to BC), having received the results of my blood work informed of the same thing!

I share this, because as you say in your video, much of society has been conditioned to accept stress as normal - and that is dangerous because in doing so we can also, by default, start accepted the results of stress as normal.... yickes!

Good news, right after I received the news yesterday from my naturopath I received an email from my neighbour inviting me for a salt water swim and hot tub soak at her health club. First temptation was to respond with my usual "I've got too much to do" but I didn't - instead I said "I'd love to and thank you so much for thinking of me." I definitely used the opportunity to start strengthening those "inner peace" and “self care” muscles.

Much love and appreciation for you!
Kim

Reality Alchemy #3 – Believe in Possibilities!

On facebook today someone posted that “If you want to draw something into your life, decide what it is and then act as though you have it. Works for me.” Great advice!
As I continued to read, one poster asked “what about a person with a disability, in pain and low mobility?” Reading this I pictured someone sitting at home, wanting god knows what, trying to “act as it” and wondering why it isn’t working for them.

I hear comments like this all the time from people who are experiencing a condition that the person declaring success isn’t, and how they really want to believe – yet it truly isn’t working for them. Does this mean this poster is wrong? No, they are absolutely right, it really can work for everyone, however there is a missing necessity here that will affect whether or not it works for someone, and simply put, that is the belief that it can.

Here is what I added to the thread:
“Often times the first obstacle is our thoughts about what we think or believe is possible due to circumstances - such as yours. First step then is to open to the possibility that anything is possible, even though you can't see how in the moment. Start where you are, feel how it feels to be open to possibilities, and then once you feel yourself believing that, it is easier to focus on attracting what it is that you want. Unfortunately, if you don’t think it is possible, chances are you’ll prove yourself right. Remember how the light bulb and airplanes were once just some wild idea? Two perfect examples of the power of belief in possibilities.”

I also want to add, that if someone is asking for some pie in the sky wish, that if the opportunity came to actually get it, chances are that they wouldn’t even know what to do with it – you have got to let those go! Make sure your wants are what you really want and what you are committed to taking action to get. If you are sitting at home saying “I wish I could travel to the moon” – then you better be prepared to do what it takes to make that possible. Or if you were wishing you were someplace warm and sunny and you can’t afford a trip – you better be at least willing to enter contests where travel is the prize. There are a gazillion ways that our desired outcomes can manifest – the key is to not be attached to how it happens, just believe that it can (consciously and unconsciously). Also, to be open and ready to act on the opportunities that will lead to your desired outcome when they present themselves. If you aren’t ready to act, if you are just sitting there wanting someone to knock on your door and give you a free trip without you having done a thing or followed any of the leads the universe sends... then you better believe with every fiber of your being, consciously and unconsciously that it is possible, otherwise you are deluding yourself. But if you do believe….it just might happen - because EVERYTHING is possible!

The Guy in the Glass

I was at a seminar last night with Ron White - The Memory Guy and he recited this poem by memory. That was not the most amazing feat he demonstrated - however the poem itself really resonated with me in respect to the work I do with my clients. I see my work as helping people connect with the "guy/gal in the glass" so that more of their life experience ends up being fulfilling!
Enjoy the read - and may it inspire you to make friends with that face that you see in the mirror!


The Guy in the Glass
by Dale Wimbrow, (c) 1934

When you get what you want in your struggle for pelf,
And the world makes you King for a day,
Then go to the mirror and look at yourself,
And see what that guy has to say.

For it isn't your Father, or Mother, or Wife,
Who judgement upon you must pass.
The feller whose verdict counts most in your life
Is the guy staring back from the glass.

He's the feller to please, never mind all the rest,
For he's with you clear up to the end,
And you've passed your most dangerous, difficult test
If the guy in the glass is your friend.

You may be like Jack Horner and "chisel" a plum,
And think you're a wonderful guy,
But the man in the glass says you're only a bum
If you can't look him straight in the eye.

You can fool the whole world down the pathway of years,
And get pats on the back as you pass,
But your final reward will be heartaches and tears
If you've cheated the guy in the glass.
In grateful memory of our father, the author, Dale Wimbrow 1895-1954